Funny signs in businesses

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  #1  
Old 03-11-03, 08:34 AM
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Funny signs in businesses

I received this in an email today:


On a Septic Tank Truck sign:
"We're #1 in the #2 business."

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix."

At a Proctologist's door:
"To expedite your visit please back in."

On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed."

On a Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber."

Pizza Shop Slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one weak."

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."

On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
"Hello. Can we pick your nose?"

At a Towing company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts."

In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."

On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push."

At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."

On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels."

On a Fence:
"Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."

Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!"

At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment.
However, if you don't, you will be delighted."

In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up."

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait."

At a Propane Filling Station:
"Tank heaven for little grills."
 
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  #2  
Old 03-11-03, 07:17 PM
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On a PLUMBER's truck:

Other people's crap is our bread and butter!



Yuck!
 
  #3  
Old 03-11-03, 08:12 PM
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That's gross, but thanks for sharing? LOL.

Someone actually had that on their truck?

Kay
 
  #4  
Old 03-12-03, 07:22 AM
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we have an elect supply here called Turtle and Hughes. on the back of their trucks it says "you were just passed by a turtle!"
sorta on the same note, a local electrician bought a used ambulance, and converted it to a work truck, a real cool idea as there are so many compartments etc, and he calls himself the Electric Dr. pretty neat.
 
  #5  
Old 03-12-03, 07:54 AM
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I like those. I'm going to have to start paying more attention to bumper stickers while going down the road, and to signs in shops.

I saw a couple awhile back (not on a vehicle, but on a rack in a parts store): one said: "marriage is finding that special someone to make miserable the rest of their lives". Another said: "All men are idiots, and I married their king" (no offense guys, really).

I own the second one, and its on my truck. I will a little upset with my hubby when I bought that one LOL. Just haven't gotten out there to take it off. Must not have been too upset since I stuck it to the glass instead of on the bumper.

Kay
 
  #6  
Old 03-12-03, 07:58 AM
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hows about "horn broken, look for finger", or "my wife says if i go to another NASCAR race she'll leave me, i'm sure gonna miss her!"
 
  #7  
Old 03-12-03, 12:31 PM
forced347
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In San Diego a Septic company

"Satisfaction guaranteed or twice your load back."
 
  #8  
Old 03-12-03, 12:37 PM
bibbouk
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  #9  
Old 03-12-03, 01:08 PM
maggy1
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my contribution

Hi:

note from my mechanic: i couldn't fix your brakes so I made your horn louder.

One I've never quite understood but think is a giggle anyway is
"Be alert - the world needs more lerts".
 
  #10  
Old 03-12-03, 01:28 PM
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My ex husband would reach out and put his hand on your head while driving down the road before stopping at a stop sign, like mom's do when stopping and putting their arms out across their kids to keep them from going too far forward (pre-seat belt era I suppose).

One day I asked him why he would do that, and he said that the sign said stop ahead, so he stopped a head LOL.

Kay
 
  #11  
Old 03-12-03, 07:08 PM
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I received an email (and I heard it on the radio) about a Philadelphia business with a sign saying:

"We would rather do business with 1000 al Qaeda terrorists than with one American."

It's a Funeral Home

Bumper sticker that caused me to be hit from behind (at least that is what I think caused the accident): "Keep Woking: Millions On Welfare Are Depending On You"

Sandie
 
  #12  
Old 03-13-03, 01:50 PM
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oh yeah, my signature was on a bumper sticker too!!!
 
  #13  
Old 03-13-03, 05:21 PM
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fatkid, i like your sig!

kay
 
  #14  
Old 03-13-03, 07:00 PM
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Well it seems like we have gone from business signs to witticisms in general... sooo....

I was riding with a friend of mine and a rather large bug hit my windshield and splatted... Friend says, "I bet he don't have the guts to do that again."

Struck me as funny...
 
  #15  
Old 03-14-03, 06:00 AM
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Thanks Kay
its actually quite far from the truth, as i would love nothing more than to have more time to "Dance w/ the Devil(ess?)", and her 2 little minions!!!
 
  #16  
Old 03-14-03, 06:58 AM
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Fatkid,

I guess thats why I like it. I know better.

Kay

Ps. Same about my bumper sticker (king one), don't really mean it.

K.
 
  #17  
Old 03-14-03, 07:03 AM
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re: your bumper sticker, at times Im sure WW would disagree w/ you, unless there is a king of the north and a king of the south!
 
  #18  
Old 03-14-03, 07:31 AM
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Sometimes I wonder if my husband is truly an idiot or just a very brave and loving man. Think about it: never been married before and marries a woman that has been married twice before and has four children, 2 of which were teenagers at the time LOL.

I think its the second one since he works so hard to ensure that the kids and I are taken care of, especially me! He's wanting to work overtime this weekend to make enough for a laptop that I've been eyeing. LOL, isn't that sweet! I told him that I already have a laptop and a desktop computer, but he wants to buy me the one I want now. Jeez, such a sweetie - would rather him be home with me this weekend than have a new computer. I'd rather play with him LOL. He just got back into town too. I'm so glad to have him home.

Kay
 
  #19  
Old 03-14-03, 08:50 AM
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they told us no work this weekend and i was siked. but alas, we have a product here that needs to be reworked and the Co. wants the setup work we are doing done ASAP, so the boss was informed we WILL be working (OT) TFN(till further notice), so that the rework can start.
WW was looking for a new puter for home. ours is so old and slow(P2-233mHz + dial-up), hence me using the puter here at work (network=speed baby!!). she gets a pretty good deal thru work, so hopefully we'll get a new one (along with the 16x20 deck we plan to put on, this spring). soon the kids will be going to pub school, so that will mean a savings on daycare!!! $1300 a month for both gals. alot of $$$(like paying another mortgage!), but its worth it, cause they love it so much, and are both learning alot. my 5 yo is reading already!!!! not Moby Dick or the wall st journal, mind you but as we are driving around she sounds out and reads signs etc. well a little far off topic and wordy but WTH!!!
 
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