Venting...

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  #1  
Old 06-25-03, 11:12 PM
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Venting...

Okay, I've already vented to my husband and I'm going to hopefully get it out of my system now. All little stupid stuff, but bugging me to no end. Some of this should probably be posted in parenting, but don't know if I can't sort out the differences right now.

Life is good. I promise my life is good. {{Kay telling herself in mantra form}}

Hmmm, am just going to start and in no particular order:

Kittens. They are everywhere. Love them to death, they are cute, but have no concept that a litter box should be used EVERYTIME. I find little remains everywhere. Driving me crazy. They are chewing my shoes up. They want to climb my legs, without pants on. They can't manage to eat food out of the bowl without climbing in there, and/or shoving all the food out into the floor. AND, they won't eat it off the floor? There are currently 8 kittens on one momma. They are sleeping on her, only two are nursing. They won't leave their momma's alone long enough for them to use the litter box either, so the momma's end up 'missing' the box even though they are standing in it. Its impossible for the big cats to use the box itself when they are standing in it, and the kittens are also in it backing the momma's up to the edge. It is a mess. One I'm personally tired of dealing with right now. Thank goodness for Out, and steam cleaners.

It seems that everytime I fix one thing in the house another goes bad. Finally got the plumbing fixed under the sink thanks to my wonderful 19yo. He can sweat a pipe so he came over and fixed me right up. Now I can use the dishwasher AND have hot water to my sink. However, the a/c quit working. The coils are dirty.

I tried cleaning them, but can only reach the top. One company last year told me that I would have to remove the unit to clean the coils. No explanation as to why, just told me to call someone else. This year, I called someone else. I got the coils clean on the top, which isn't the problem. The air moves from the bottom upwards so the underside needs to be cleaned. Okay, problem is that there is no access to the underside of the coils except through the back of the unit, which means the ductwork has to be removed to remove the coils to be cleaned. These are York 'A' style coils not your standard 'A' coils. You can't lift the ductwork since they somehow built this sucker into the small closet. The solid duct has to be destroyed to get it removed off the coils to begin with. Now I have 4 choices. Only one which is a guaranteed to work. 1) remove the duct and clean the coils and rebuild the duct, 2) remove the duct, clean the coils, reverse the coils as they should have been to begin with so the access panel would be on the correct side of the coils, 3) remove the duct, replace the coils 4) replace the unit. All labor intensive, all expensive. No quotes on the coil issue alone, but I know that I don't have the money for the new unit ($5,000 for what I currently have, minus the heat pump; $8,000 for the recommended size for this house, same setup minus heatpump; or $9,000 for the kick butt unit that has the 10yr warranty). I don't have $5,000. I don't want to borrow it since I have enough trouble keeping current on our bills as it is. So...I go buy 3 window units (window shakers is an understatement) hoping to put one in our bedroom (addition with vaulted ceiling), the living room and one of the kid's room for that small end of the house. Get them home and realize that the kids have outlets under their windows, but they aren't grounded. Electrician: $1000 to ground them out. So, I have 3 window units all in one end of the house. To deal with the kids' rooms I closed all the vents in this end of the house, and run the fan so at least some of the cool air will move through the returns and into their rooms. The apparently is enough air moving through the coils to accomplish slight cooling with the a/c, but only slight before the coils freeze up the few passages that are open.

Two sounds like the option I want to take if the quote is reasonable. One may be the only way we can go. Option 2 requires that the coolant lines and drain line be moved. My unit is over 20 years old as it is, so I don't want to replace the coils. I hate to piecemeal new parts into this old machine. Okay, so at least its a little cooler in here so I can think. The heat, no, the humidity here is killer. Literally. I also have no crossflow ventilation in the house except through the narrow side. Its cool at night, but the days are what get us.

Okay, now to more petty stuff. I stood there in the kitchen watching my daughter, who just woke up, take out the birthday cake wanting some for breakfast. This is the same child who is 46% body fat. She's 16, and still clueless. Okay, after telling her no, she turns around and makes a sandwich with mayo on it. I have no problem with mayo, I promise. The problem is that just 2 weeks ago she made a major scene about swapping hamburger tops with her brother. He literally will throw up if he eats mayo. I eat mayo on mine, so I couldn't swap. Anyway, she threw a total fit swearing that she hates mayo yadayada...so I took the bottom of my burger off to trade with him. The lie, and the simple fact that she was being a bottom-head just irritated me today. That day too.

Then, I go to Sam's to buy some things left on my grocery list. I come home, and the counters are covered with crud. No one can even put a dish in the dishwasher, or the sink...it all lands on the counters. So today I've had to play the meanie and check everyone on what they're doing. I didn't get anything done myself, but made sure they were leaving messes for me to work on just because they're too lazy to walk two feet to the sink. I was not real kind in my words either. I think I'm too kind when it comes to the kids. Another thing. I had room for the meat I purchased, PLUS a huge box of soft pretzels. This should not have been possible considering that we could barely fit all the freezer stuff in there just 3 days ago. The kids are literally eating me out of house and home. I told them that we had 1 1/2 weeks left before I would be able to buy more groceries so they'd better slow down or they'll be going hungry. I have some money saved up so Mike and I will just go out to eat if that happens.

The 12yo has a dog sitting job that she is taking way too serious. She bugs the fool out of me with it. She wants to walk the bigger two dogs, but I told her that she can't unless I'm with her since they will get away from her. She wants to do this when its 90 degrees outside, not early in the morning or late in the evening. Then, bless her heart, she locked herself out of their house. Okay, so here I am with my neighbor not even home, and I'm breaking into her house. Not a pretty site. We did find an unlocked window that we could get her in through so no harm done, but need to let her know that there is an access into her home.

Okay, now about the dog. This is the same neighbor's dog. I love her to death, she's pregnant and currently visiting her husband who is in basic training and also some sort of other training. She hasn't seen him in 3 months. I hate to be a bad neighbor, but her dog digs under my fence into my yard. He knows that he can jump the fence on the other side of my property, then their fence and be free. He doesn't go anywhere but striaght to their front porch. The problem is the digging. My yard, as is everyone's through here, is higher than hers. This is to have level yards. Well, now along my fenceline I have these 2 foot wide, by 1 foot deep holes. How in the heck am I going to fill them? And why, because Bear will just dig them out again. To keep him in there we have a huge piece of concrete over one hole, next to it a piece of plywood laid on the ground because if won't fit between the fence and the ground, and has a sawhorse on it to keep it down. Another hole has a tire with bricks in it, and on her side we have a four wheeler over a hole..... jeez, I look like I live in Mississippi and have a junkyard in my backyard. What in the heck am I suppose to do? Why should I have to put a different type of fence up when I have no dogs? Why should I have to go through this when I have no dogs. Why can't I have anything nice? I don't have the money for landscaping so I have just an average yard. Now this. I can't even have that! My hubby and I are going to try to figure out how to lay chicken wire (which I have since their dogs were jumping our fence and fighting with mine - when I had dogs. We strung it across the top of the original fence. Let me tell you, its right perty too.

So, to make me happy right now I need about a million dollars. I was hoping to make this plan happen: take one of Mike's rare commission checks and have either option 1 or 2 done on the a/c, and then save the future commission checks in hopes of getting the new unit (cheapest one and pray for the best). Now, I am wondering if I should go for option 1 or 2 and then spend the next commission check after that on a wood fence for my yard. The whole yard, with a concrete footing! Of course, that would end up being two commission checks. These only come every 3 months so we're looking at years

Okay, just had to send the 10yo to bed. Its 1 a.m. and they're still up. Fine, the rule is that after midnight they have to be in their rooms. He was in the living room playing with the kittens. Not usually a problem, but you have 10 kittens, a 10yo, a kitty condo and about a million cat toys all managing to be everywhere at once. His explanation, "I was just helping them to have more fun". Daycare from H3LL in 1300 square feet.

guys, I'm going on vacation the end of July and I cannot wait. No phones (no internet - yikes, feeling withdrawals coming on already!), no tv, by the lake, in a cabin, in the woods.... Just me and my best friend. Miss this place? Doubt it. Miss the kids? Nope, won't be gone that long. They're already upset because they're having to stay at my mom's while I'm gone. They've been on their worst behavior lately so leaving them here is not an option right now. Miss 16yo, who thinks she's lord god master of the universe is not going to be left in charge.

Okay, I'm through for a bit. Need to study, something I'm so behind on since the kids keep bugging me to use the computer and I'm taking online courses. Jeez. Every 5 minutes I hear "will you let me know when you're through". I just tell them I'll be through when h3ll freezes over. It doesn't work though.

Kay
 
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Old 06-26-03, 02:44 PM
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Talking Relax..............Take a deep breath..................Now doesn't that feel better!.

You would be an excellent customer!
Where's that fightin' DIY spirit?

There is bound to be a cheap a/c solution. As long as the unit is cooling we should be able to figure something out.
How about some pics?

Other than a couple of meat rabbits I have been pet free for a couple of years.
A German Shepherd that had a mind of her own and couldn't be trained with the time I had was difficult to get rid of.
It took about one week to get over it though.
Now, no more scratching at the door, stealing stuff from the neighbours, raiding garbage cans, chasing cars on the highway and best of all no smell from animal waste which no matter how hard you try you never get rid of. In fact when you try to cover it up, only you don't notice it, others always do.
I miss having them around but I certainly don't miss the bad stuff.
 
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Old 06-26-03, 08:37 PM
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Okay, you asked for it. I am posting a link to pictures in the heating and cooling forum.

Here's a link for it here, too.

http://www.kaybyrd.com/hvac/

Kay

Ps. I really didn't have the tools to make a good page for this so please bear with the 'album' program I used.

K.
 
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Old 06-28-03, 08:41 PM
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Okay, Kaybyrd, here is the offer... Give me an address, directions, and phone number in my email... I will leave Saturday morning of next week, I will get there in time to work some Saturday... Hook me up with a local place to stay and I will spend Sunday doing what I can on your A/C, and I will do anything on the plumbing that you need... I guarantee I can get access to the coils of your unit and I can get it put back together... It doesn't sound like you are getting the best of advice from your a/c guy, and I would LOVE to get my hands on that water heater of yours... ...
 
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Old 06-28-03, 09:31 PM
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Ragnar,

You are so sweet to offer. I just fixed the a/c. Yes, believe or not (I still don't believe it) but I did it! The 19yo fixed the plumbing for me, and GregH had asked me to post some pictures. He walked me through it, with lots of encouragement too. It was a job for me, but now that I know how its done it won't be such a bother next time. I just didn't know what I was working with but now that I know the layout of the coils it will be easier next time...and yes, next year (if I don't have my new unit) I will be in there cleaning them again. I don't ever want to go through that mess again. I took pictures of the crud in there and will post them a little later on.

I'm sitting here freezing now. This is so neat!

The water heater is working fine now. It seems that we've had a leak going on under the dishwasher for awhile now. Hot water...no wonder we rarely had any. I'm surprised there wasn't more damage than was there, but got that fixed up too. I even have a new dishwasher! A present from DH and he even installed it for me.

I'm out of this 'funk' of defeat feeling. One question that GregH asked shook me enough to get me started on the a/c again. He simply asked: "Where's that fightin' DIY spirit?"

I don't think I'll start anymore projects soon. I really need to focus on cleaning up my house. Its going to be easier since I don't have to stumble over the tools I've had out while trying to work on everything.

Gosh everyone. I'm on cloud nine right now. It works!

Off to buy good filters for the a/c!

Kay
 
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Old 06-28-03, 09:35 PM
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Actually, I just wanted an excuse to reconnect your water heater... but I am glad you got it all fixed...
 
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Old 06-28-03, 09:38 PM
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You still have first dibs on the water heater when I get around to replacing it.

Kay
 
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Old 06-28-03, 09:40 PM
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oh wow, that is still the old one in the pic? cool... yeah, just buy one and I will be glad to come install it for no charge... You can pay my gas money for the trip if it makes you feel better... ...
 
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Old 06-28-03, 09:44 PM
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I'll take you out to dinner, set you up at one of our finer Southaven hotels, and pay your gas!

Yes, its still the old one in the picture. One of these days....

Kay
 
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Old 06-30-03, 05:45 PM
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Venting

Ragnar and GregH always come through. Wonder if I could sucker them into a stay at my mountain cabin that needs so much work. Don't you just love our mods?

kaybyrd, you have to establish a bedtime--lights out. Just like in the military. Dad was so strict about it that I read my way through high school with a flashlight under the covers. I bought a pocket size radio with earphones so I could listen to music under the covers. Kids adapt. Say what you mean, mean what you say. Bedtime is bedtime. I know school is out. But, geez, we need our down time after kids are in bed. And, you need down time, really LOW down time, with Mike after the kids are in bed.

You have to get rid of some of those pets. You are not running an animal hospital or animal shelter. Think how much better your house would smell, if you eliminated the majority of the population. You are such a social worker. If it weren't animals, you'd probably be taking in homeless people.

Please keep a slot open for me, as when my business fails I will probably be looking for a home just like the Boll Weevil:


The first time I saw little Weevil
He was on the Western Plain.
Next time I saw the Weevil
he was riding a Memphis train.
He was looking for a home, just looking for a home.

When the Farmer saw those Boll Weevils
They were in his rocking chair.
The next time they were in his corn field
and they had all their family there,
Just fixing up a home, yes, fixing up a home.
The Boll Weevil say to the Farmer,
"You can ride in that Ford machine,
But when I get through with your cotton
you can't buy gasoline,
You won't have no home, won't have no home."

The Merchant said to the Farmer,
"Well, what do you think of that?
If you'll get rid of the Weevil
I'll give you a brand new Stetson hat.
He's looking for a home, just looking for a home."
The Farmer took little Weevil
And put him in Paris Green.
The Weevil said to the Farmer,
"It's the best I've ever seen.
I'm goin' to have a home, a happy home."

The Farmer took the Boll Weevil
And put him in a frying pan.
Weevil said to the Farmer,
"It's mighty warm, but I'll stand it like a man.
This will be my home, yes, this will be my home."
The Weevil grabbed the Farmer
And throwed him in the sand
Put on the Farmer's overcoat
and stood up like a natural man.
Said, "I'm going to have a home, a happy home."

The Farmer said to the Merchant,
"I need some meat and meal."
"Get away from here you son of a gun,
you got Boll Weevils in your field.
Going to get your home, going to get your home."
The Farmer said to the Merchant,
"I didn't make but one bale,
But before I let you have that one
I'll suffer and die in jail.
I'll have a home, I'll have a home!"

Well, the Merchant got half the cotton,
The Boll Weevils got the rest.
Didn't leave the poor Farmer's wife
but one old cotton dress,
And it's full of holes, all full of holes.


kaybyrd, you are the most resourceful female I ever knew. I stand at attention when you post. You are so full of yourself. I am sure others on these forums do so as well. If I knew how to do anything mechanical for you and to save you $$, I'd be there. But, I need you here because you know more than I. That's another story.

It's moments like this that bring us mods together that make it all worthwhile here. I love my DIY mods. We have grown to be a tight group.

Dig up around the fence and install hardware cloth or chicken wire, as you say, to eliminate the digging under the fence. Don't refence if existing fence is going to survive for a few years. Of course, you could resort to "green weenie" poisonous weenies soaked in that fluid they put in the radiators (what do they call that?), but that would be cruelty to animals. I could not do that.

Exclusion is the best and most sane method. You could also have a discussion with neighbors. I am Irish, and discussions don't usually go well. That's why I pawn them off on Nadine my bookeeper and Willie my kitchen designer at work. I am not good in confrontations. I know one way. My way or the highway. I am more congenial if I don't have on the mountain boots, but I am very defensive because of years of abuse. I am very professional at all times, but I pass off all confrontations if I can. Usually, if I am personally confronted, you know me, I am a pansy, when alone I will do anything to please, despite my bravado in posts and the big boots. Professionalism is our motto. And, it's tough sometimes.

Congrats to Ms.doityourself.com for getting her A/C up and running. We need to come up with our own inhouse prize system. Great idea for Admin?!? (Are you reading this Robert?) Maybe we should have Admin send you a new tool. How about a sledge hammer to control unruly relationships in your life? Or, an ax, Lizzy Borden put one to good use! (LOL! Sorry, but I am the one who warns against the use of humor in forums because of potential misinterpretation.)

Love you! kaybyrd and all the byrdies! Thank goodness, you will not go out of town and leave your kids alone with the teen child. You are a wise woman. If I lived nearby, I'd volunteer to babysit and be your drill sargeant. The kids would welcome you home after Ms. Family Studies sat with them for a few days. I know all the tricks, as I had 3 very bad brothers!

Enjoy yourself on your vacation. You did not tell us where you were going? Where do Mississippians go for vacation? Send a post card, you wench!

Love and best regards,

Also hugs and kisses to Ragnar & GregH for being such heroes!

P
 

Last edited by twelvepole; 06-30-03 at 06:04 PM.
  #11  
Old 06-30-03, 06:18 PM
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I think the prizes should go to my heros in this adventure. Without them, I would have never tried. I honestly believed that I could not do this. They encouraged me, and explained carefully (I'm a nervous nilly) how to do it. Armed with their knowledge I attempted it, and did it! Now I am going to check out the unit outside and get it cleaned up. Will have to wait for the rain to stop. It does tend to rain hard here.

I'm wanting to come see you and your cabin. In mistakingly spending money on window units, I used my car money. I will talk to my mechanic son about fixing it here instead of at the shop. He said it shouldn't be hard to do here, so I will take him up on that. Just need to get the parts together and figure out which day he's off work. I know he's off Friday, but hate to ask him to not have a day off. He's helped me so much around here. I can do the brakes, but not sure about the spindle bearing. He's the one with the groovy shop toolbox full of those really needed tools so I will have to rely on him for this.

The momma's are finally weaning the kittens. I've given one away, and am waiting to give Susan her's. We need to figure out how to get rid of fleas on kittens (vet is best bet I'm sure) since I don't want her baby getting fleas off Beautiful. Tomorrow I will contact Mr. John across the street and get the number of the lady that is wanting my kittens. Then there will be none! I can't wait to get things back to normal around here. Scheduling an appointment to have the momma's spayed is HIGH on my call list too. That is a super high priority that should have been done, oh like, 6 months ago!

I finally unloaded a dryer that I've been hanging on to for ages now. Mike's mom had a storage building in the town she lived in, so I took most of the stuff stored there and put it here to save her money. The dryer was the last thing that I had left after the kids (her kids) needed stuff. One Byrd brother has been saying that he's needed this dryer for two years now. He finally has it! Thank goodness. The BIL that lives down the street passed on the message to the BIL that lives across town that if he didn't come get it soon that I was putting it to the curb (meemaw said to get rid of what no one wanted). Do you know what they did with their old dryer? Stuck it in their bedroom LOL. Said the heating element needed replacing. Oh well, and I thought I was a packrat! If they get their dryer fixed and need a place to store the one they just got from here, they can store it in their bedroom! I'm not taking on anything else.

I guess when I do come see you Twelvepole, we can go to the cabin and start figuring where we should start. Then we can schedule a time for me to come back and do some of the work? This way we can determine if I need to bring the truck and trailer second time 'round so we can haul what we need, or will someone deliver AND what we can and cannot afford to do right now.

The fence: what is hardware cloth? I do have chicken wire, but plan on installing it on their side of my fence. I'll have to figure out how to secure it until the ground actually covers it. I just so happen to have this stuff from where my dogs were digging out of the kennel. After that, I'm going to figure out how to put a board or something even down in the hole so I can fill it up with dirt and maybe have a clean even yard on my side.

Where am I going on my vacation: Montgonery Bell State Park. We've rented a cabin there. Its only $48 per night, so between the two of us we can do this. Last year Susie used her Hilton points so we stayed in Nashville for a total of $30. That was nice. We're also going during the week, so its a lot cheaper. I believe she said its on the other side of Nashville from me. She lives in SW Kentucky so we don't really go too far. We're just looking to two old friends just vegetating for a few days! We're planning our grocery list now since she will pick up everything before we head out. KY doesn't have sales tax on food!? There's a kitchenette there so we don't have to worry about roughing it too much LOL. I'm so excited about it. This is the second year of our new annual event. Meagan is talking about maybe spending the week with her father. I told her that wasn't a good idea because if something went wrong I wouldn't be able to come get her. It seems that for some reason or another if they plan to stay more than a few days with their dad something always comes up and I end up having to go and get them. I told her that maybe some other time since I really would like to know that they are safe and sound and I can just enjoy myself for a few days.

Okay, maybe I've chatted a little much right now LOL.

Love you too Twelvepole. Hopefully soon I will be telling you this in person! I sure wish you lived closer so I could help out. My kids are dying to meet you too. Not my first trip though. I'm going to be selfish on that one!

Kay
 
  #12  
Old 07-03-03, 06:14 PM
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Unhappy

kaybyrd, I know how you feel about the kittens. We have 5 kittens, 3 adult cats (including mama), and 3 dogs. My house is never clean. We just completed a 2-car garage with a MIL apartment for my mom so now I'm trying to get her apartment arranged. BTW, she has 3 cats. We have a fenced-in yard and a pet door so you can imagine what my floor looks like. We have baby gates so the dogs can't get to the carpet. I absolutely love my animals but sometimes......they really get to me. My DH is a saint to put up with all of it. I feel so guilty because he never complains about it but he deserves a clean house since he works so hard. I only work 30 hours a week so I "try" to take care of everything else. The kittens will be 8 weeks old on Tuesday and I know I can't but I want to keep them. I keep telling myself you'll never get a vacation if you keep accumulating animals. Haven't had a vacation in 7 years. I really need one. I also need to get motivated to do some decluttering over the 3 day weekend. Thanks for letting me vent a little.

Barbara
 
  #13  
Old 07-03-03, 06:32 PM
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Barabara,

Thanks for posting. It helps me when others share what's going on with them. Makes me realize I'm not alone in things like this.

Its so hard to not get attached to them while they're growing up! We've got names for them, but at times can't really tell who's who since both mommas are sisters, and had their kittens about the same time.

We have Velcro Kitty (sticks to and climbs anything!), Football Head (so small with a big head that she looks like Arnold off "Hey Arnold" the cartoon), BBro (Bear's brother), Bear - who was the first to leave the pack to go live in his new home, Beautiful (gray, and well, beautiful - going to live with my SIL when she gets back in town), BJ (Boo Junior, also gray and looks like his uncle Boo), Lucky (who's lucky to be alive - my daughter saved her at birth), Roxy, Mix (only brown one out of the litters), SideWinder (runs around the house practically sideways and always bowed up), and Little Bit (she's as tiny as Football Head, but perfectly proportioned).

Part of me wants to keep them all, but the other part realizes that I already have 5 cats (including the moms) and I can't afford to have 13 cats (mommas, 10 kittens and Boo) fixed and their shots, and their other care as they get older. Not to mention that my house is literally a zoo with 5 people living here, and only 1300 sf of space to do it. Most people don't own a steam cleaner, they rent one when needed. I own one. I also keep the litter companies in business.

I would also like Boo to feel like he can come back inside. He can smell the kittens from outside and will hiss and growl at the door without really being that close to it. He can smell them on us too, so he growls at us (while rubbing on us and letting us love him). So funny, almost like a grumpy old man just mumbling! Its going to take the kittens being gone and me de-cat smelling my house as much as possible after their gone before he'll ever consider coming back inside. I hate that since he's such a loving and good cat.

Kay
 
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Old 08-06-03, 10:26 PM
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Have you considered using tranquilizer darts on the kids, or invisible fence? I doubt that these options are legal, just suggested them to make you feel better. Try putting your daughter in a body cast, and gag her. You may find life a lot easier to deal with that way.
 
  #15  
Old 08-07-03, 05:09 AM
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I think the tranquelizer darts I will use on myself hehehe. I would love a little tranquility.

The best thing that has happened so far is that twelvepole called me. Yes, she chewed me out (lovingly and caring). We talked for awhile and it did make me feel better about my life.

When I came home from vacation things had happened, no one bothered to tell me these things while I was gone so I got 'bombed' with them when I walked in the door.

The point is: I know that people can and do affect my life. Its how I respond to, not react to, these situations.

Today I'm going to focus on being selfish. I'm going to take care of what's important to me from now on. Maybe I should use a different word here, lets use 'selfing' since I was selfish before. If I take care of myself then I can be a better mom, wife, and friend. Things that are important to me, really important are things like a clean home, clean and well running car, nice yard... Okay, so if I am 'selfish' and take care of these things and myself the rest of the family will benefit anyway.

Plus, I have hope today since I realize that the kids start school next week!!!!!!!! They're excited about it and have been helping me go through their rooms and clothing to see what all we need to start with and what we may need to get. We've also been throwing away or giving away what is no longer worn. I've tried to get them to do this all summer long, but had no help. Now they're doing it on their own. Maybe its my new attitude that's helping. Instead of being the 'boss' I'm being a partner in this adventure of ours.

I'm also going back to work. I do need more adult conversation and interaction than just family members and DIY (LOL). Not sure where I'm going to work though. Will cross that bridge when I get to it.

Kay
 
  #16  
Old 08-09-03, 05:38 AM
maggy1
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nice to be back!

Hi: Well, Kay, been away for a while however see you're still being awesome at fixing stuff and trying to keep everything togther. If it helps at all, I have a 19 yo who is trying desparately to make it to old age without saying "can I help with anything"!

He's my hubby's son and, in five years, has never offered to help his father or myself with anything. My hubby's answer is "why didn't you ask him". WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO?

Anyway, at the risk of starting back on a negative note........as my dear mom used to say......this too shall pass!

Hang in there!
 
  #17  
Old 08-09-03, 08:39 AM
kaybyrd's Avatar
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I have a 16yo and 12yo that are the same way. Even if I ask for help, it never comes. I shouldn't have to ask. This is their home too.

The most recent thing I've done is give allowance. I don't buy much of anything beyond basic living needs now, however, they have to earn the money. The 10yo is broke. He says its too hot to mow the yard. He begged for that job, did it once and now its back to Mike or I mowing. Even funnier is that the 16 yo is broke as well (she sells Avon during the school year for her money) so she offered to mow the lawn day before yesterday. She came back inside and said that we needed gas for the mower.

I didn't have the car so I couldn't run get any, so I told her that she could do it for me another day. I went out there yesterday to get the gas can, and it was full of gas. The mower was also half full of gas. After I mowed the front and backyard she came outside. I told her that the liquid in the gas can and inside the mower was GAS. She said that she had tried to start the mower and it wouldn't crank. Hmmmm, the yard hasn't been mowed in 3 weeks, and the mower isn't in the best shape to begin with - she knows all this. Funnier yet, it cranked on the second pull for me.

Wonder if she thought she'd get 'paid' for the effort? Nope, now I'm $20 richer LOL. I'm going to take my DH out to a movie tonight. They're (the kids) keep trying to convince me just to rent movies with my allowance. hehehehe NO.

Kay
 
  #18  
Old 08-09-03, 11:22 AM
maggy1
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I'm with you!

Mine is working, although only part time, and is still not doing zilch at the house.....hubby is working today (90 degrees + humidity) to install new window (he does for living however own house needed some - one more to go then they're all done!....son has been home all morning - very large pile of dishes all over kitchen, laundy in dryer needing folding......his room could use dusting, could cut the grass, offer to help, anything.....but nope, nada!

He's off school all summer................doing absolutely nothing...........I've never asked him to do anything only out of principle - offer to help if you like but I'll break my back doing something instead of asking him for help!

I find it frustrating however dad doesn't seem to mind (otherwise he'd make him do something).............I can't really say anything so I quietly stir until it really starts to p)**^ me off!

I haven't actually done anything about it yet but I'm thinking of going on strike.....wonder what would happen then!
 
  #19  
Old 08-09-03, 12:15 PM
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I went on strike once. It lasted about 2 months. They finally got a clue that I was more than happy to wash me a dish to eat out of, more than happy to go to the store to buy me something to eat, and more than happy to wash only my clothes. They've started helping out more now that I've threatened to go on strike again.

Kay

Ps. The 19yo that is so helpful now, well he wasn't always that helpful. He dropped out of school his junior year and tried to sit around my house the rest of the time. I kicked him out. My mom took him in at that point, and he began working full time. He didn't move back in with me until right before his 18th birthday. He's been a whole different kid since he came back from Vegas, too. Spent almost a year there, and when he first got home (January) he sat around for about a week, then started looking for work again.

K.
 
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