Plumbers I need your help


Old 02-02-06, 04:42 AM
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Farmersville Texas
Posts: 175
Angry Plumbers I need your help

I have been doing a remodel job for a friend of mine and not charged him one penney for the labor. His wife has done nothing but complain from the very start. Examples: Doesnt want me there working after she gets home from work because the saws and things bother her. Doesnt want me there on weekends because thats her time off and then complains that its all not done yet. Here is what I have done as of now. This is a 3 bedroom 2 full bath trailer house about 10 years old. Tore out and replaced floor in master bedroom and bath. New sink in master bath. new comode in master bath. installed new whirlpool bath in master bath which required tearing out half of a wall and building a really nice cabinet which now devides the bedroom and bath where the half of the wall I tore out did before. She didnt like the skirting they offered fo0r the new tub so I desighned a skirting and built it and installed which she complains is too dark now. The house was plumbed with quest and I unhooked all the quest and completely replumbed the whole house with copper. They have paid for all material. Would two or three of you please give me a ball park figure on what you would have charged for the work I have done so I can show her what she has saved and maybe shut her whinning butt up.

Thanks folks
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Old 02-02-06, 05:13 AM
pgtek's Avatar
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: north Carolina
Posts: 1,391
count your hours work and a plumber rate paid by employer is about 45 per hour
that should shut her fat mouth lol lol
Old 02-02-06, 07:05 AM
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: USA
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Count your blessing. Feel sorry for your friend.
Old 02-02-06, 06:51 PM
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: KY/OH
Posts: 3,523
I followed this thread from the forum you posted in plumbing/heating/air conditioning.

Ball park is in the thousands, bottom line. The only way she'll appreciate what you have done is only if you pay all the bills for her and wash the dog most likely. Unrealistic? You bet. She does not care one bit of your help to your friend.

There is a fine line in the sand that you cross when it comes to doing favors for others. I myself tend to do a few for some who never ask, not those who want.

Every time I did something as a favor for someone who wanted me to, it always backfired and was never appreciated in the least. I remodeled a room for a now ex-girlfriend's parents home, never got a thank you, just an ongoing complaint that I didn't put a grill cover back on a hot air duct. A $3 dollar item. Let's see here, I bought the carpet, drywall, molding, paint, door trim. Paid for all the materials and did the work, and all I get is complaining that they have no heat cover? Pffffffffffffft! Shows the lack of disregard for one's time and effort.

The reason I shared that short story is because you are not alone in your situation. You could tell her $10,000 and she isn't going to care. What will be in your best interest is to pick your tools up, save face and protect yourself from such ignorance and never return to do one more thing for your friend.

A true friend would stick up for you in this matter, it sounds more like he is using you for personal gain. I'm only speculating but those who knock the good will of others have no place to complain.

Figure out why you are really doing all the work for free. There has to be a payoff for the reasons why you're doing it. I got plenty of friends but those who consistently take from me disappeared years ago. They never matched the same amount of time and dedication I gave them. I am now the Capital One commercial to a tee,


I applaud your kindness towards others, it is a good character trait you should be proud of. Just protect yourself from those who are there for the free meal ticket.
Old 02-02-06, 07:41 PM
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Farmersville Texas
Posts: 175
Just what I expected from you guys. Straight , honest and no punches pulled with a little humor thrown in. Thanks. I guess a lot of posting this was a form of venting also but I had just came from their house this morning and he had just told me how she thought the skirting around the tub was to dark now. All I did was spray some clear sealent on it . He knows the money I have saved him but he has not definded me one time. She has never said anything to me she always says it to him after im gone and he tells me the next day. He saysa he tells her that i'm saving them a lot of money but that is all he says. I'm doing this for him because i'm retired and I do some remodeling around town just to be busy. I'm only 45 so I can still put in a good days work. He just got layed off from his job so I figured this would really help him out. I dont want anyone kissing my backside but showing a little appreciation would be nice. I'll take Dunbars advice and chalk this one up as experiance and next time just say no.

Marksr - I thought the very same thing. Poor guy

pgtek I will use that dollar figure for the fake bill I give her. Of course I will wait a day or two before telling her it's fake.

Thanks again folks.
Old 02-03-06, 01:14 AM
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Fruit Heights, Utah
Posts: 280
Turkey and lots of wine...she'll be out for the weekend . I find it rediculous she wants this done, but when it's convenient for her. The more you can work...the faster she won't need to hear the sound of your tools. Just stand in front of her, cross your arms, and nod your head. If things haven't magically been completed, let her know something like this takes a little time, patience and some understanding. Isn't there something or someone she can go shoe shopping with (shoe comment taking from another thread)?
Old 02-03-06, 05:12 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: WI/MN
Posts: 18,497
I rarely give my services away. Not because I'm greedy, but because people put no value into anything that has no cost. Other than about a half dozen immediate family members and friends, everybody pays. Even if it's only a few dollars, the fact that they have to pay makes everyone happier. Hold up your end of the deal and finish the job, explain to your friend why you're never going to do this for him (as long as she's around) again and then charge at least a nominal fee from here on out.
Old 02-03-06, 05:13 AM
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Location: SW Fla USA
Posts: 11,519
Have you tried being blunt and direct?

"Look, every time I have to bend my schedule around yours AND every time you pester me, the completion just gets that much further away. What part of that don't you understand other than the part that I'm doing this for NOTHING?"
Old 02-03-06, 05:39 AM
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Cape Cod
Posts: 4,320
Well that story sounds too familiar

The best solution I have found is this
When a friend or relative needs/wants some work done, refer them to a colleague
Have the colleague refer you when his/her friends relatives need/wants some work done

It sounds cold, but it beats loosing friends or not speaking to relatives any more

It sort of goes along with the "can you help me with this project?"
Me: "Sure"
Me: Shows up in the morning with tools ready to go
Friend :... is leaving for work
Me: "?!?! Where are you going?"
Friend: "I can't afford to take time off from work"


Me: "Neither can I! What do you think I am doing if I show up here instead of earning a living?!?!"
Friend: "Huh?"
Old 02-03-06, 10:15 AM
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: KY/OH
Posts: 3,523
I am still partial to the "shock and awe" approach of picking up the tools and leaving for good.The situation you are in will likely continue.

Leaves a permanent impression, it will be an emotional moment for the ones that lose you and your free help. I've done it twice and the shock wave it sends is tremendous. It provides a valuable learning lesson of life to WAKE UP and quit taking advantage of one's good deeds. People like this have diminished value. :nfunny:
Old 02-03-06, 10:52 AM
majakdragon's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: N.E. Arkansas
Posts: 7,827
Another story about doing things for people.
My old neighbor never spoke to me when we were both in the yard. He and my Step-dad were both union roofers and didn't get along. One day I saw a Plumbing truck at their house and the next day the neighbors wife told me that they had a leak in their bathroom sink and the Plumber wanted $90 to fix it. She asked if I would take a look at it. I looked and it was simply a leaking copper elbow. She asked if I could fix it and how much. I said $25 and she said to go ahead. I replaced the elbow and she paid me. Later that day I saw her husband and he complained because it only took me a half hour to fix it. I told him " You were going to have to pay $90 so I saved you money. If you had spoken to me before, I would have done it for free." The man made a point of speaking everytime after that.
Old 02-03-06, 12:36 PM
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Baltimore County Maryland
Posts: 2,138

I think that you need a heart to heart talk with your [FRIEND?] It looks like he dosen't even give you verbal support. Ask him what his definition for friend is, it may be sucker.
Old 02-06-06, 11:07 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,158
She has never said anything to me she always says it to him after im gone and he tells me the next day.
that's really thoughtful of your "friend" to recap for you each day all the horrible things she's said the night before.......

he can't even be considerate & tactful enough to reword it? geez.....nice guy.

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