Things we learned from TV and movies

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Old 04-26-09, 12:52 PM
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Talking Things we learned from TV and movies

Got this as an email several years ago, lemme see how much I remember.

You can open any lock in 5 seconds with a credit card.

In a gang fight, opponents will only fight you one at a time.

When you turn on the news there is a story that directly concerns you.

Whne you get hit in the head, you must be close to finding out something.

People never have to use the facilities.

You can drink 15 martinis in onme night and be fine the next morning.

Everyone at high school is a model, male or female.

If you are on a just cause, you will never get nailed for speeding.

The engine compartment of a vehicle is never dirty.

Bolt heads never break off when doing engine work.

Everyone has a vehicle lift and pneumatic tools in their garage.

People never curse when working on a vehicle (what planet are they from?).

The guy at the auto parts store delivers your parts.

You never get sold the wrong part for your vehicle.

Carburetor (sp.?) mounting nuts never fall into the intake manifold.

There is no such thing as a beater vehicle unless it belongs to the one token geek.

People never have 10 unregistered cars in their yards (oops guilty of that several years ago. Musical license plates is a fun game).

If you leave your car running outside a store, it is never stolen. (tempted, never did it myself either side of that story)

If anyone can add others, please do
 
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Old 04-26-09, 02:30 PM
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Originally Posted by nightowlpunk View Post
Everyone at high school is a model, male or female.
Its not just the high schoolers that are all supermodels -- none of MY neighbors look like the folks on Wisteria Lane.
 
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Old 04-26-09, 02:46 PM
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There is always a parking space exactly in front of where the person is going.

You can here explosions in outer space.

If you are a main character Bones can save you. If your a walk on he won't even try CPR. He'll just look at you and say, "Dead, Jim".

(From before cell phones) The bad guy cuts the phone cord before leaving and after he leaves everyone just stares at the cord saying, "Oh God, we can't call the police. No one even tries to splice the phone cord.

The heroine never helps the hero that just rescued her. She just watches as the bad guy pummels him. Geeze, she can't pick up the chair the good guy just untied her from and hit the bad guy over the head?
 
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Old 04-26-09, 03:08 PM
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If someone's in your house and they're after you, go into the dark basement with no way out!

If you're on a busy street and someone's after you, run down into the subway or some other dark ditch to hide!

If a whole army of bad guys are shooting at you, not to worry, you can take them all down singlehandedly with your trusty machine guns (one in each hand), LOL!
 
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Old 04-26-09, 03:19 PM
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From CHiPs, The guy who looks a little out of it causes a 15 car pileup.

Even though there was plenty of wood on Gilligan's Island, the professor never thought of building a boat.

Even when you are shipwrecked, you and your clothes look immaculate.

The loser guy always gets a girlfriend, seen from "Better Off Dead", and the American Pie series.

On LOST, after the first boat was destroyed, they didn't try to build another as far as I know. I lost any respect I had for that show after that episode.

A number can be more than it is. Why is "24" more than 24 episodes?
Do not mean to ruffle any feathers with this one, just couldn't get into it myself.

The amount of students at Smallville High School that were not affected somehow by the media shower is probably equal to the number of participants in a nude polar bear run off the coast of Antarctica.
 
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Old 04-26-09, 03:59 PM
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*When you're home alone and burglars break in, run for the ringing phone, not your .357 magnum. That guy on the other end will save the day!
*For the older guys.... riding a horse, jump on your adversary, wrestle him down into a ravine and you both still have your cowboy hats on.
*Gunfights on TV last for 20 minutes, expend at least 200 rounds, no one reloads, no one gets hurt....give me a break....one shot one kill.
*And we believe the weather forecasters like they have magical powers or something.
 
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Old 04-27-09, 06:51 AM
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Originally Posted by nightowlpunk View Post
In a gang fight, opponents will only fight you one at a time.
Reminds me how Jason Stathom in the Transporter series (Transporter 2) can beat up 10 or 12 guys at once. Yet, not all 10 or 12 come at him at once. The others stand there watching, while one by one, they get eliminated. But I am a sucker for watching such movies when these 'real men/he-men can take on and whip so many guys in very clever fashion.

Then there is Steven Segal(sp.). He can really manhandle guys. Even throws them through walls, out windows, through buffet units, etc. I love to watch that guy in action.


I like to watch Chuck Norris beat people up also. I really like it when the big oaf thinks Chuck should be a piece of cake, til he learns differently.

Actually that is how Transporter 2 started out with these behomoth guys who planned on taking his car. Jason left all 4 or 5 dudes on the ground wrything in pain, including the 400 pounder, who presumed little ol Jason should be a piece of cake -especially when 4 or 5 against 1.

............................................................

My answer to the thread: I learned that "there is no place like home"...about for the 75th time in my life.
 
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Old 04-27-09, 07:16 AM
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Originally Posted by Shadeladie View Post
If a whole army of bad guys are shooting at you, not to worry, you can take them all down singlehandedly with your trusty machine guns (one in each hand), LOL!
My fav is that the bad guys, no matter how organized of an operation they are in, always fire their weapons from the shoulder and couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with a scatter gun at ten paces! Meanwhile, the good guy turns around to face them, WITH NO COVER, and fires his weapon from the hip and manages to strike one foe after another directly in the chest. Amazing!

But the one that bothers me the most is from chase scenes, like in the Dukes of Hazard, Starsky and Hutch, or any thing ever shot in San Fransisco. A regular street legal car makes a high speed jump over a rise in the road or an impromptu ramp, and then drives away!?! The car would be totaled!! The suspension would bend all to crap like a pretzel, the oil pan would shatter on the asphalt and the transmission would bust into a million pieces flattening the rear tires and possibly over turning the vehicle. But not for Bo and Luke. Them "good ol' boys" jumped that Charger over and over and over.....
 
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Old 04-27-09, 07:29 AM
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"CHiPs" was the all-time best at spectacular-crash-of-the-week scenarios.

I also love to catch invented technology, added features, and the scientifically impossible, like Bruce Willis ejecting from a C-130 in Die Hard 2. Been in a lot of C-130s in my life, but never saw one with an ejection seat. Then uses a Zippo to light a trail of jet fuel in the snow that travels all the way to the airborne aircraft of the bad guys. Aaah, yeah.
 
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Old 04-27-09, 12:21 PM
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The 10 guys fighting you thing got me laughing in The Kentucky Fried Movie in the skit that is The Wizard of Oz meets Enter The Dragon. Great movie if you don't object to occasional nudity.
 
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Old 04-27-09, 02:08 PM
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How about being hit across the shoulders with a six-foot-long piece of steel pipe swung like a baseball bat and not even going down on one knee? Or being thrown twenty feet and landing on a wall six above the floor with no injuries or even having the wind knocked from you?
 
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Old 04-27-09, 03:35 PM
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I don't remember the name of the show but my kids liked it. Lee Majors had a 4x4 with a lift and big tires. He's just a flying off road and comes to hill, jumps off the hill and lands on the hiway [you can see all the front suspension and steering parts break, bend and/or fall off] - next shot, inside the cab, he grabs another gear and chases off after the bad guy.

Where do you find a truck that tuff?
 
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Old 04-27-09, 03:36 PM
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"Fall Guy".
 
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