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  #1  
Old 10-11-09, 10:58 PM
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Craigs List Personal Ad

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AN ACTUAL CRAIG'S LIST PERSONALS AD

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in Downtown Savannah night before last.
Date: 2009-05-27, 1:43 a.m.

I was the guy wearing the black Burberry jacket that you demanded that I hand over, shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my girlfriend, threatening our lives. You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings. I can only hope that you somehow come across this rather important message.

First, I'd like to apologize for your embarrassment; I didn't expect you to actually crap in your pants when I drew my pistol after you took my jacket. The evening was not that cold, and I was wearing the jacket for a reason. My girlfriend had just bought me that Kimber Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for my birthday, and we had picked up a shoulder holster for it that very evening.

Obviously you agree that it is a very intimidating weapon when pointed at your head ... isn't it?!

I know it probably wasn't fun walking back to wherever you'd come from with that brown sludge in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse walking bare-footed since I made you leave your shoes, cell phone, and wallet with me.

[That prevented you from calling or running to your buddies to come help mug us again].

After I called your mother or "Momma" as you had her listed in your cell, I explained the entire episode of what you'd done. Then I went and filled up my gas tank as well as those of four other people in the gas station, -- on your credit card. The guy with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to a homeless guy outside Vinnie Van Go Go's, along with all the cash in your wallet. [That made his day!]

I then threw your wallet into the big pink "pimp mobile" that was parked at the curb ... after I broke the windshield and side window and keyed the entire driver's side of the car.

Later, I called a bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. Ma Bell just now shut down the line, although I only used the phone for a little over a day now, so what 's going on with that? Earlier, I managed to get in two threatening phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI, while mentioning President Obama as my possible target.

The FBI guy seemed really intense and we had a nice long chat (I guess while he traced your number etc.).

In a way, perhaps I should apologize for not killing you ... but I feel this type of retribution is a far more appropriate punishment for your threatened crime. I wish you well as you try to sort through some of these rather immediate pressing issues, and can only h ope that you have the opportunity to reflect upon, and perhaps reconsider, the career path you've chosen to pursue in life.

Remember, next time you might not be so lucky.Have a good day!

Thoughtfully yours,
Alex
 
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  #2  
Old 10-12-09, 08:18 AM
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I'm so sure.

Why didn't he call the cops off the cell phone? And was he allowed to carry the gun? If so, no problem holding the guy. If he wasn't, he is in trouble either way - if he waited for cops to come, or not. How did he know the guy went in his pants? Why didn't the theif, after the gun was on him, simply hand back the guy's stuff and apologize and say it never happen again? And the guy attacked knows all these numbers on attckers cell phone log are sex numbers?, and he threatens the President?

I'm sure. Interesting read though.
 
  #3  
Old 10-12-09, 09:51 AM
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Ya and if true [which I doubt] once he used the thief's credit card and damaged property he became just as much a crook as the would be mugger was.
 
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Old 10-12-09, 09:53 AM
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Old 10-12-09, 10:10 AM
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You guys take all the fun out of everything!!! lol

Seriously though, I dated a girl, who knew a guy, who said he used to work with a guy, who heard that it really happened....lol
 
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Old 10-12-09, 10:34 AM
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Geeze no more posting jokes in here. Ever see the Crocodile Dundee movie where he pulls the 12" toad stabber? That is what I was thinking of as I read.

God help anyone who posts in here a out Santa's sleigh. You guys would have your slide rules out muttering abour aerodynamic lift.
 
  #7  
Old 10-12-09, 12:40 PM
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I typically look things like this up on Snopes because it drives me nuts when people start spreading these stories and it aint true. Ray, that was not directed towards you by the way. Example: My father in law called today saying Applebee's is going to mail him a $50 certificate for forwarding a spam email to 5 other people. He actually thought it was legit.
 
  #8  
Old 10-12-09, 01:01 PM
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I too am a Snopester but that was so obviously satire I didn't think I needed to label it.
 
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Old 10-12-09, 01:34 PM
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it most likely never had any reality to back it up but it would be hilarious if it did. While I am not a big fan of two wrongs and thinking it makes a right, I still think it would be hilarious if it were real.
 
  #10  
Old 10-12-09, 02:43 PM
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You could tell it was a joke--because--in real life the guy would have shot the perp
just to impress his girl friend & her new gift of the .45..........
At least that's how it would of happened around here....................

Ain' I nasty................
 
  #11  
Old 10-12-09, 06:17 PM
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I did keep reading the post over to myself, before posting. As, we all know, often there are true stories out there that you cannot even make up, they are so weird - yet true.

I always enjoy the bumbling bank robber ones where someone is dumber than a box of rocks.

Did any of you see that bar shootout on the news last night, or the night before? Looked like something out of the old west.

Also, me and a friend of mine were discussing what makes some people think they can get away with say embezzling thousands of dollars from their employer over months or years without thinking they'd ever get caught. Like doesn't it dawn on the embezzler(often a woman secretary) that the owner of tthe company might go, "Gee......let's see here, we sold 75,000 widgets last year and I made all of $75 net after expenses."
 
  #12  
Old 10-13-09, 03:14 PM
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The 80 y/o bookkeeper mother of the female owner of a bar I used to go to in VA was caught stealing from her employer. She had been working for them over 20 yrs. She stole almost $500K over 10 yrs. 18 months in prison and restitution. Had to sell her house and her daughters house, since she was the actual owner.
 
  #13  
Old 10-13-09, 07:26 PM
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Originally Posted by Gunguy45 View Post
The 80 y/o bookkeeper mother of the female owner of a bar I used to go to in VA was caught stealing from her employer. She had been working for them over 20 yrs. She stole almost $500K over 10 yrs. 18 months in prison and restitution. Had to sell her house and her daughters house, since she was the actual owner.
A friend told me that a female relative got 12 years for doing this. I can't figure out how people can be sentenced differently. I think I posted this once here: This real backwoods looking guy - think "Deliverance" - got the book thrown at him for manslaughter for running over and killing a schoolbus kid, by accident. I bet if something like that happened except the driver was the hottest thing you ever laid your eyes on, they'd get a slap on the wrist.
 
  #14  
Old 10-13-09, 09:18 PM
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To begin, sentences are according to the germane states laws. Some states have harsher penalties for a similar crime as another state.

then, you have the actual crime charged. There are often many factors that can change the crime; amount of money, relationship with between the thief and the victim; how it was stolen, and others.

If the person was a licensed pro, that can change the crime

a court can accept a plea deal worked out between a defendant and the DA that allows a lower crime to be charged and resultingly a lesser sentence.

the defendants history can cause both the crime charged to be different as well as the sentence can be more harsh for a repeat offender.

the judge got up on the wrong side of the bed the day of sentencing

There are myriad reasons why one person gets no jail time and another gets 10 years for the same crime. Unless you are very familiar with both cases being compared, there is no way to even suggest why it is the way it is.
 
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Old 10-14-09, 03:51 AM
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Or you could be a Cub Scout with your spork, eating your lunch and be sentenced to reform school by a non tolerant school system. Or you could be a promising high school student destined for a military career and accepted at West Point who has his grandfather's pocket knife in a box in his car in the parking lot, and have your future scrapped by some puke school system.
Justice is not always "just".
Of course if you are a child molester you stand more of a chance of a slap on the wrist than those kids did.
 
  #16  
Old 10-14-09, 05:29 PM
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Originally Posted by nap View Post
the judge got up on the wrong side of the bed the day of sentencing
I hope that does not really happen. Such a judge like that would need to be disbarred.

There are myriad reasons why one person gets no jail time and another gets 10 years for the same crime. Unless you are very familiar with both cases being compared, there is no way to even suggest why it is the way it is.
I suggested one way -the person is ugly or has that look of never amounting to anything of importance.

Everyone should be treated the same way, if the same kind of crime was committed. I think often too much information is entered into the trial, to create emotions. Tooo much information is entered in to water down the case.

Just get down to brass tacks as to what was done and sentence on that alone. Not based on how one person was saving up to go to tech school to be a nurse, and needed more money, and made 'an unfortunate error in judgement', and was looking out for the welfare of some little child or baby. While the other poor sap gets the book thrown at him because he is a 'worthless nobody'. IMO, trials should be done blind folded and with voices scrambled, to be fair about it.

How can one know that the person who say embezzled for the betterment of some young child, let's say, will not reoffend, if let off lightly - and the person who cannot use that excuse is the one who might never reoffend?


If a judge, I'd be like: "Oh, you did such and such, eh? Bang. This is your sentence. I do not want to hear why you did it. You did it. If you did it to help feed your kid (I bet that one is used a lot), tough. The end. "
 
  #17  
Old 10-14-09, 05:34 PM
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Originally Posted by chandler View Post
Of course if you are a child molester you stand more of a chance of a slap on the wrist than those kids did.
This is one of the most talked about crimes, today. And around here, sentencing has varied from a slap on the wrist of months in jail with probation thereafter, to 40 years without any chance fo parole. Both for doing bad things, even on a repeated basis to even pre-teens. How can the sentence vary by so much? ?????
 
  #18  
Old 10-14-09, 07:48 PM
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=ecman51`;1634620]I hope that does not really happen. Such a judge like that would need to be disbarred.
why? There are often state mandated max and min sentencing guidelines> A judge is fully within his discretionary powers to be anywhere within those guidelines. If he is having a bad day, do you really think it is not going to affect how he sentences the 12 child molester he saw that week?



I suggested one way -the person is ugly or has that look of never amounting to anything of importance.
I would say this is probable the least influential reasons. While a persons dress and manners within a court may sway the judge, I have never seen actual physical beauty make a real difference.

Everyone should be treated the same way, if the same kind of crime was committed.
there are often many other factors to be considered when sentencing a person. It would not be fair to make it a cookie cutter sentencing system.

I think often too much information is entered into the trial, to create emotions. Tooo much information is entered in to water down the case.
there are rules as to what can and cannot be brought into a case. If one side attempts to bring things in merely to be influential in the manner you suggest, it is the duty of the opposing side to object to the presentation.

Just get down to brass tacks as to what was done and sentence on that alone. Not based on how one person was saving up to go to tech school to be a nurse, and needed more money, and made 'an unfortunate error in judgement', and was looking out for the welfare of some little child or baby. While the other poor sap gets the book thrown at him because he is a 'worthless nobody'. IMO, trials should be done blind folded and with voices scrambled, to be fair about it.
Ok, make it simpler:

2 child molesters. 1 was raised in a perfect home. Dad paid for college and then something just happened in the kid and he started molesting kids.

another guy was molested as a child from the age of 4 until he left home at 18. Sodomized by his father who also continually told the kid he was worthless.


exact same crime. Do both of those defendants deserve the same sentence?

How can one know that the person who say embezzled for the betterment of some young child, let's say, will not reoffend, if let off lightly - and the person who cannot use that excuse is the one who might never reoffend?
You don't. You can only guess and use their history as a guide to how they might act in the future.


If a judge, I'd be like: "Oh, you did such and such, eh? Bang. This is your sentence. I do not want to hear why you did it. You did it. If you did it to help feed your kid (I bet that one is used a lot), tough. The end.
would hate to see you as a judge. Those are people standing in front of the judge receiving their sentences. There are variables in their crimes and the story behind those crimes. Hopefully you really are not as devoid of compassion as this thread suggests you are ecman.
 
  #19  
Old 10-15-09, 06:18 PM
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Originally Posted by chandler View Post
Or you could be a Cub Scout with your spork, eating your lunch ........
ha! omg, i HATE sporks!!!! a clever invention in theory, yes, but OUCH! am i the only one who jabs my tongue with the prongs with every bite??????
 
  #20  
Old 10-15-09, 07:04 PM
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Well, what he had was called a spork, but wasn't what you are familiar with. His was a combination knife, fork and spoon in a pocket knife configuration. Yeah, you don't eat Frosties with a spork.
 
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