Does your wife help?


Old 05-16-10, 02:09 PM
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Does your wife help?

My wife and I are in our early 60's. We have always done our own work when possible. She is willing to help me with anything I am doing. Yesterday she did 90% of the work on the first course of a stone wall. I was busy with another project and she wanted to get started.
How many of you have a helpmate that is willing to work with and encourage you?
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Old 05-16-10, 04:06 PM
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Old 05-16-10, 05:51 PM
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Giles, I'm in the same group as you. Both my wife and I are active around our place. She does all the planning and research, especially regarding the organic garden. I drive the tractor. We both plant the seeds and plants (sets).
However, the line is drawn there. She stays out of my shop and I stay out of the laundry. Although we work together on certain areas, I still like my own time. Likewise, she likes to read in quiet. My brain can't slow down enough to read things like novels.
She is an ICU nurse and often gets home after 730pm so I do all the cooking. It's my kitchen. And they are her chickens.
Old 05-16-10, 06:25 PM
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Chandler-I know exactly what you are talking about and there is a line drawn. We raised three kids on a farm and she would always help me even with the "dirty jobs"
We talk about a project and she says "we can do that"
As you are well aware the hired labor cost of a project is usually several times the cost of materials and that is where money can be saved.
Old 05-16-10, 08:20 PM
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I do most of the handyman work around here but she does all the house stuff (cooking, cleaning, laundry) We both plant/tend the garden. She just turned 40 today. She's old.
(I'm 38)
Old 05-17-10, 12:26 AM
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Giles, what you have is diffently a gift from God! If two people respect and love each other, they usually do a lot of things as a team. Me, well if I wanted to spend time with my husband, I would need to go out to the garage. I learned how to rebuild an engine, run romax, install outlets, frame, replace shingles, install tile to name a few. So I did those things because I loved him. Yet, when a husband does not reciprocate after many years, the desire to spend time together is less. So guys, tell and show your wives how much you appreciate them working with you.
Old 05-17-10, 03:47 AM
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Giles, that's why our grandparents had such large families. Think about it. You probably have more than 4 or 5 aunts and/or uncles. Built in labor pool for the farm. Families did their own thing back then with little outside hired help.
Chilly, good point! But you will have to admit (and this is not from a sexist standpoint) men's interests are more varied, entail more tools, require entire buildings to do it in, and produce results that would cost an arm and a leg if you had to pay for it. It's just difficult to get a man interested in sewing up torn jeans, washing a load of clothes without turning the underwear pink, or keeping a tidy house. It just isn't in our psyche. My wife is visiting friends in Sarasota this week, so I am having to double up keeping the house clean, feeding all the animals, and doing my things. That makes me appreciate what she does, for sure!! She is due back Tuesday afternoon. I'll get it cleaned up by then, don't worry!
Old 05-17-10, 05:20 AM
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Ya, my mother's parents had 10 kids [8 girls] and a 27 acre farm. My grandfather knew how to work, he worked in a foundry 44 hrs a week, drove a coal truck 10 hrs on saturday and farmed in his spare time....... well I suspect my uncles did most of the farming When they both grew up, they moved to town and neither one would have anything to do with farming. My grandmother always had plenty of help keeping the house clean, canning, etc
Old 05-17-10, 05:45 AM
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We've been married 41 years and are inveterate DIYers. She tells me what she wants done and I do it. She helps me on projects if I ask, but I seldom ask. We like it that way.

I do the yard work, the handyman work, the gardening, the auto maintenance, the grocery shopping, the laundry, the dishes and the cooking.

To be fair she works full time - I'm retired.
Old 05-18-10, 04:51 PM
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Some married couples I think are fine with the "me Tarzan, you Jane", mentality. My mom has never mowed the lawn or put gas in her car. Neither has the wife of my next door neighbor. The husbands are fine with that. The wives do the clothes and clean and cook.

I'm afraid I would lean that way myself. If I wanted a helper for a female, I'd marry Bob, who is probably stronger. I would want someone to come home to who smells good, not sweaty.

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