I need some advice from men over 50


Old 05-09-18, 09:25 AM
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Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: united states
Posts: 46
I need some advice from men over 50

I need some advice for men over 50. I bought a two acre dump seven years ago, because it was dirt cheap. I paid 10,000 cash, It has a well and septic. I have hauled off all the the junk around the yard, replaced all plumbing, tore out and replaced all drywall and electric myself I have worked on it every summer for the last seven years. I have done all the work myself. Have not had a vacation in seven years. the last two years I have had heat and cooling. I am getting ready to move into it. Now............my job has moved................how do i let this thing go. Been such a big part of my life, I don't even know if I can recoup all the money I put into the house. How can I walk away and just get what I can for it. Have you ever had anything that kicked your butt. How do you move on. Single male here, no children. The fact that i never give up is my greatest strength............and my biggest weakness.
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Old 05-09-18, 10:11 AM
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I'll be 59 this year. We flooded in 2016 & did a total remodel on the house even replacing sinks & tubs in the bathroom on a 30+ year old home that had never been remodeled. We even replaced all the electrical outlets & switches even though we didnt have to.
We wanted to get out of a sub-division & get back to our roots in the country, hopefully on 2 - 5 acres with a ranch style 60's - 70's home. But, we had been planning to do that for a few years & it never came to pass. We updated anyway for two reasons:
If we eventually ended up staying there, we'd have a home that we could enjoy that was just the way we wanted it,
Or, if we sold it & moved, ours would be one of, if not the nicest home in the sub-division & would attract a better offer & go quicker.
The problem, we put more money into the house than was necesary & what we should have put into it. We could have put just enough to do a basic remodel & get $95,000 or so, but we put about twice as much into it & got $115,000. We knew that while we got above the market value for the area, we didn't get as much as we would have gotten if it would have been in another neighborhood.
To get to your question, we discussed this very possibility & while it wasn't the right financial decision, it was the personal decision we made. Both for our personal satisfaction of a nice home to live in & we did get probably $20,000 more & eventually did sell quicker than it otherwise would have in a neighborhood that floods every 20 years or so.
So while it wasn't the perfect situation, we discussed & agreed that whatever happened, we had to accept this as the eventual decision that we made together for OUR SPECIFIC SITUATION.

Plans don't always work out. This is life & we have to evaluate our decision as.... it was the best decision I could make at the time, based on the situation at the time. Things change & sometimes we cant control that.
At this point, you have to decide whether moving with your job is the best thing for you financially & personally based on the facts you have today.
If moving with your job is the best thing for you financially & personally, then your only option is to accept that, sell the property at the best price you can negotiate & move on, know that its the best decision for you to make today, based on the facts you have today.

The last note to my story is, we found a ranch style home built in 1968 on 5 acres for about $30,000 less than market value, that is about 30 ft up on a hill with no chance of ever flooding & we couldn't be happier under the circumstances over the last 10 years to present. Two happy little campers out here.
With the money we got out of the old home, our payments are actually $100 cheaper on this home & 5 acres than we were paying for a home & lot in a subdivision.
Old 05-09-18, 10:32 AM
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Wet side of Washington state.
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I'm reminded of a quotation I have somewhere, can't find it at the moment. It is something like A man's happiness cannot be connected to anything that may be taken away from him. Unfortunately I don't even remember the person making the statement.

I'll be 68 next month and I cannot begin to count up the "things" that have been taken away from me in one manner or another. I was I was involved with making a historical museum from an old steam-electric generating station located in Seattle. I poured my heart and soul into that project along with quite a sum of real money from my own pocket. It was "taken" from me when the owner decided to kick out the non-profit corporation doing the work.

Many other things but the latest has been my health. I can barely walk these days and I get out of the house maybe once every ten days or so. My eyesight is also failing along with many other parts of my body.

I have no family and few friends. My best friend, my cat Douglas, died last December. He was just a few months shy of twenty years old and while I knew his days were numbered little did I realize how hard it would affect me in the physical sense.

Live your life the best that you can. Do not let others define you. Do what you can to make the world a better place and never forget that YOU are just as important as anyone. You can't take material things with you when you die so enjoy them while you can and when they are gone, for whatever reason, let them go.

Bottom line: Live each day as if it were your last and have no regrets.
Old 05-09-18, 12:16 PM
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: North East Kingdom of Vermont
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This thread is getting me depressed . . . . I just turned 71 earlier this year and you guys are making me feel like I should have one foot in the grave already.
Old 05-09-18, 03:44 PM
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Location: united states
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Didn't mean to bum you out.......just assessing some things

I am forgetting my house this summer. Hopefully I will be backpacking in Colorado this summer. This older lady off you-tube helped my spirits.

Old 05-09-18, 04:25 PM
Join Date: May 2018
Location: Usa
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Have you considered changing jobs and remaining in your house? I’m 55 in two weeks and am going to begin a new career (my 3rd). You don’t have children or a spouse to worry about so you expenses shouldn’t be too great. Don’t allow your job to dictate what you do. Make that choice yourself.
Old 05-09-18, 05:09 PM
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I've moved 6 times job related to move up in the ranks of the corporate world. The think that is hardest is leaving the friends you made at the old location. You show up, don't know a soul and slowly you build new friendships and withing 6 months, it is like you had already lived there your whole life. So don't sweat the move. All before I got into business for myself.

As far as the property? You could keep it and retire there someday. Or, sell it, and buy a new property and start a second project giving new life to another old and tired property.
Old 05-09-18, 06:21 PM
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Thanks Guys

Thanks Guys, I appreciate the informative and positive advise.
Old 05-10-18, 05:06 AM
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Try to find a buyer who cares about the kind of effort you put into it. That's what happened when we bought the cabin from the seller. He liked us and understood what the cabin meant to us.

Many times a family will sell a house and then find out the new owner changed things in the house and they feel a bit insulted as if to say "what was wrong with what I lived with?" I feel just the opposite. If a home that I sold is changed, improved and modified from what I had, I consider it a compliment that the new owners cared enough to make it better.
Old 05-10-18, 05:50 AM
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Unless I missed it, I don't think anyone suggested keeping it as a rental. Gives you options down the line.
Old 08-11-18, 08:18 AM
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To the OP......what's the latest ?
Old 08-11-18, 05:46 PM
Join Date: Jan 2011
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"Want to hear God laugh out loud? Tell him your plans for your life"
People that really know me, and there's few that do ask me how have you held it together after all you have been through.
What goods it do to fall apart, I already have a plan B I'm working on.
I've lost everything I held dear in a few divorces, had my house burn down, one wife died, the boat I was living on sank in a hurricane so I was then homeless.
I borrowed $1500.00 from my dad to buy a POS old truck just so I would have a place to sleep.
Within a year I had my contractors licence, 4 guys working for me and we where booked up for a year in advance.
Bought a house, had 2 trucks, 4 trailers full of tools.
Then the economy tanked and the phone stopped ringing.
I let everyone go, sold what I could just to make the house payments.
Decided to retire and buy a lawn mower just to make some extra money.
Within a year I had 50 customers and now I'm working sometimes 7 days a week if it's not raining
One door closes, another will open if your willing to open it.
I'm too dumb to know you can fail, I just keep going full speed ahead.
Old 08-11-18, 07:10 PM
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I love your story. Good to hear. No one who is successful that didn't have failures. Real successes is how you feel about yourself.
Old 08-11-18, 07:27 PM
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Hmmm ? for men over 50? No, the pills aren't magic...no matter what The Big Hurt says.
Old 08-12-18, 08:22 AM
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: USA
Posts: 4,294
I have a sign in my bedroom that says "I couldn't wait for success so I went ahead without it"
I used to have one on my boat that said "Never had less but enjoyed it more"
Most people do not get it.

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