Teach Your Grandchildren Well
Senior citizens have a lifetime of experience in everything from housekeeping to running a business. Seniors also have the advantage of time on their hands to do as they please. Upon retirement, many feel that their lives have ended -- when in reality it has just begun. Now is the time to really enjoy life. And there is no better way to enjoy life than to teach your grandchildren the values and knowledge you have gained over the many years you have been on this earth. We discuss here the art of teaching your grandchildren and what you can do to make their lives more meaningful.
What You As A Grandparent Must Know
It is important to realize as grandparents that your grandkids just weren't raised like you were. Members of the older generation have been raised with different values, different discipline and with much greater authority. Nowadays, that has all changed. Kids are likely raised in a household where both parents work. Mom and Dad rush off to work in the morning, and when they return they are busy with daily chores. The children often are relegated to the television as babysitter and mentor. It is not a good situation for anyone. Grandparents, on the other hand, have unlimited time to give to their grandchildren, so the best thing they can do for their grandkids is to mentor them.
Cause And Effect
When children act out, they do so in predictable ways. Three things generally motivate them. These are:
* They want something
* They are trying to avoid something
* They wish to change the level of excitement in the home.
Recognizing these attributes goes a long way in dealing with the grandchild. The way that children communicate their desires that is difficult for people to live with. We need to remember that they do not have the social skills or communication levels that we do in order to deal with them.
If a child wants something, they often misbehave. If it is something that you don't wish them to have, simply tell them no, and try to give a short, logical explanation why. Teach them to ask in an appropriate way, and teach them that if they do so, their chances of getting what they want are much better.
Often, children will act inappropriately when they are trying to avoid something. If a child turns into a monster just before leaving for school, for example, there may be something there that is bothering them. Get them to talk about what is bothering them. The solution may be something as simple as making a phone call to the appropriate person in the school system, or talking to the parents of someone who may be bullying the child. Children do not perceive or process threats as seniors do. Relaying this information to a child will help them to grow.
Acting out when the home is filled with visitors or during a holiday celebration can be an indicator that the child needs relief from the excitement. They may need to retreat to their own personal place, or be allowed to go outdoors to play. Children will act this way intentionally to get your attention. Perhaps the child feels left out of the festivities. In trying to get your attention, they can become obnoxious. It is our obligation as adults to teach our grandkids how to be appropriate and pleasant to be around. If we fail to do this, then the child has no other option than to learn the best way they can.
Support Groups For Grandparents
You might be overwhelmed by grandkids that misbehave, and not know how to deal with it. For the grandparent that is clueless, there are support groups. A good place to go for information is Ability.org. If a grandparent has mobility or transportation issues, this is a great place to start. The site is very large, and can answer more questions than the scope of this article can cover. It is probably one of the best sites on the web.
Whether you are an old hand at raising children, or find yourself in the role of helping raise your grandchildren, it is your obligation to teach them, and teach them well. Don't let lack of information stop you. There is plenty available.
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Alden Smith is an award winning author and regular contributor to DoItYourself.com. He writes on a variety of subjects, and excels in research.